Here’s the huge difference between misinformation and disinformation.

 

A person relaying misinformation usually believes that the information he is giving is correct information.

 

A person relaying disinformation knows that the information he is giving is deceptive in one or more ways.

 

Examples of each:

 

Misinformation: “Seattle is only about twenty miles north of here” the Texan (mistakenly) told his driver as they reached the outskirts of Olympia, Washington.

 

Disinformation: “Now that marriage equality has been made the law of the land by the Supreme Court of the United States, the next thing we can expect is that pedophiles will be granted the right to marry children”  (conflating consensual same-sex adult martial commitment with illegal practices that subjugate children).

 

I bring this up because yesterday I went bike riding with someone I quickly discerned is a Fox viewer. On the way to Orting I was astonished to hear what’s been keeping her up at night for weeks: the recent marriage equality decision issued by the Supreme Court.

 

I was speechless for a moment…but it didn’t take long to find my voice.

 

“What is it about the decision that upsets you?”

 

“Well, I’m a Christian.”

 

“So am I. But we have no right in the United States of America to deny any committed couple the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, which frequently includes  matrimony. We’re a democracy, not a theocracy. We have separation of church and state to make sure people are free to worship and pursue tenets of their faith, or not worship or believe in a  Supreme Being at all, as they see fit and to live their lives without governmental, parochial or societal interference as long as they aren’t denying other people their life, liberty or the pursuit of happiness in the process.”

 

She responded, “I’m just concerned that the Supreme Court decision is the first step toward allowing pedophiles to marry underage children; and I’m hearing that parents won’t be allowed to opt their children out of classes that teach about homosexuality and other controversial issues.”

 

I said, “Oh, my gosh. None of that is true. Where did you get this information?”

 

“It’s common knowledge. Everybody is talking about this on the news.”

 

“Really? Well, what you’ve heard along those lines is willful disinformation. It’s deliberate distortion and repeated lies that are designed to freak you out and make you afraid. No one is going to pass a law allowing pedophiles to engage with underage children who haven’t reached the age of consent. I don’t care what side of the aisle a legislator sits on; it’s just not going to happen. And as for the education aspect.  Why would we  deny children important information about the array of gender expressions so that the ones who don’t feel they fit into the usual male/female heterosexual binary know they aren’t alone so they don’t commit suicide as often as they’re doing right now?”

 

She didn’t know what to say to any of this, so she said nothing at all.  I added, “Just one more question, if I may: At what age did you decide to be heterosexual?”

 

When she looked at me as if I had two heads for asking, I continued, “Exactly. No one chooses who to be attracted to, or the way in which we’ll express our true natures as we grow into a greater understanding of our mindset, drives and impulses. We just know naturally where we stand at a certain point, usually years before we reach puberty. So it isn’t a decision at all–it’s hard-wired into us. Our gender identity is an inside job, not an outside manifestation. Sometimes it matches, inside and out. Sometimes it doesn’t. And no matter which way a person experiences and expresses his or her gender identity, it’s natural to them!”

While we unloaded the bikes from the bike rack, I explained intersex, transgender, cis-gender and other terms that help define the sex/gender spectrum. I could tell they were nearly all new terms and concepts to her.

I also told her that I am either intersex (surgically altered shortly after birth to reflect only the female aspects of  a dual-gendered body) or transgender, one of countless people whose outward physical expression indicates one gender while my mind and soul express the other gender: someone who believes was born into the wrong-gendered body as the result of some kind of birth defect, some gender-based mind transposition late in my mom’s pregnancy, or some other unknown, little-understood mind/body anomaly.

This dear lady wants to keep biking with me, so I guess I didn’t scare her away, but I probably threw her for quite a loop! I do hope that what I shared opens her eyes, her heart, and her mind a little bit so she realizes, belatedly (at 60 something years of age), that there isn’t just one calcified, unchangeable way to experience and express affection and attraction. There never has been. There never will be.  It’s time to understand this and to embrace the idea that loving another person is okay. It’s hatred, warfare and fear that need to be sent packing, not affection, commitment, and love!

All this by way of explaining the difference between misinformation and disinformation. My friend was grievously misled using oft-repeated, calculated disinformation which she repeated to me as misinformation (something she believed to be true) based on the information she had been given by far-right fundamentalist ideologues.  It took another perspective to show her that the so-called “consequences” she had feared were drummed up to create a sense of “them” and “us” so she would begin to fear people who aren’t cis-gendered heterosexuals like she is.

It’s important to keep an open mind whenever someone tries to scare you. They’re usually the ones you should be most scared of!  If they’ll lie to you, they’ll lie about you.